In his essay The Power of the Powerless, the Czech dissident Vaclav Havel argues persuasively that dictatorships fear dissent and dissidents because modern dictatorships claim their politics (fascism, communism, white supremacy) are the Truth and the truth empowers them. To openly express different views, to imply the government doesn’t have a monopoly on the truth, sounds to the tyrant like an attack on their authority
An excellent Dr. Nerdlove post on toxic masculinity argues the same attitude shapes some men’s intolerance for nonconforming guys: their definition of masculinity “only can work as the “standard” as long as everyone agrees to play by the same rules. People who diverge from its dictates threaten to undermine the “truth” in “biotruth”. Trans people challenge the idea that being a man is inherent in one’s genitalia or having a Y chromosome. Feminine acting or presenting gay men challenge male sexual roles. Passive, submissive or emotionally expressive men put paid to the idea that men must be aggressive and stoic. And because they challenge the status-quo, they must be forced back into compliance, whether through mockery and derision or through outright violence.”
As I’ve mentioned before, when men such as J.D. Vance whine that feminists won’t let men be men (which is not true unless you mean “feminists object to having a 1950s male-dominant hierarchy”), they ignore that men are heavily invested in policing male behavior. “Let men be men” refers to a specific type of male stereotype — a guy who chases women, likes scotch and cigars, watches sports, plays sports, etc. (as far as I know, nobody’s stopping guys from doing any of that). It doesn’t extend to letting guys who prefer theater, opera, biochemistry or herbal tea be men in their own way (to say nothing of guys who are gay, asexual, trans, etc.). Those guys undercut the idea manhood is a narrow path and all Real Men are on it. As Nerdlove says, the alternatives have to be dismissed — white knighting, beta male, etc. Similarly I’ve read What Men Are Like articles that claim any man who says he’s faithful is lying, or any man who doesn’t objectify women is just posing to impress them.
Of course the same is true of men who perform masculinity for other men, to impress their buddies or their community. That’s okay, though because the performance affirms the supposed truth of stereotypical masculinity instead of questioning it. I’ve covered a lot of this stuff but the Nerdlove post is worth reading.
Toxic masculinity is also deeply entwined with rape culture, which is enough of a reason to post this quote about the Steubenville rape case from an old post of mine (the quote is not mine, links in the piece): “the guys who made a video laughing about it, the spreading of the images, the unwillingness of anyone to interfere, the congratulations for domineering, abusive behavior. That is why assault happens, not because some girls drink too much. We need to help young people, both men and women, spot predatory behavior for what it is, and to push against it instead of laughing it off.”
In other moments of misogyny:
NYT’s Kellen Browning quotes A-OC as follows:
As noted at the link, nobody quotes the Necrotic Toddler like this — nobody quotes anyone like this. It’s standard journalistic practice to chop out uh, you know, um and other pause-words in speech; it doesn’t change the meaning, it makes it clearer and more readable. Quoting it verbatim is a way to make a highly intelligent woman sound like she’s the one sliding into senility, not the Toddler; it’s a dry run for what to expect if she ever runs for higher office than she has now (if you thought they were bad with Hilary Clinton …)
Lying antifeminists Allie Beth Stuckey and Megan Basham are terribly, terribly upset some Christian women are upset over the murders of Renee Good and Alex Pretti — where is the compassion for ICE agents?
Another pregnant woman who can’t get an abortion and dies. Lots of women who live get arrested for drug use in pregnancy — based on inaccurate tests. As Jessica Valenti says, “Think about the worst guy you knew in high school. The biggest jerk in class, the most ignorant asshole—the guy who bullied other students or made people miserable. Now imagine he’s the district attorney in your county who decides what happens to women who have abortions. Or that he’s your police chief. Or your state representative.”
