And the less than adequate (#SFWApro)

I’ve already reviewed 2035: Forbidden Dimensions, but here are the others that didn’t impress me:

With SyFy’s SUPERCOLLIDER (2013) the problem might be just fatigue from viewing so many time-travel films, but I’m inclined to think it’s the film. The title piece of technology rips open time, plunging the protagonist (and everyone else) into a dystopia where the economy is collapsed and his family fell apart after his wife’s car accident got their girl killed. The concept is decent enough—even if they do have to throw SyFy’s beloved super-storms into the pot—but the execution is very low-budget (even given the future is grimy and depressed, the sets still look cheap) and the lead actor is too stiff to express the grief he’s supposed to feel. This is one of the few where it might all be a dream (there’s no evidence to suggest otherwise). “It is easier to believe your world changed rather than that your mental health might be the issue.”

FLASHBACK (2011) is an impressively stupid film parody in which a janitor at a 32nd century movie studio (it says a lot that nobody noticed 3205 is in the 33rd century) tries to win a pretty starlet against a backdrop of film sendups (“Lord of the Rock, the heavy metal version of your favorite fantasy epic!”). There is a time-travel element as the janitor uses a time machine first to do over his big date, then to save the starlet from a bomb, but it’s insignificant enough I’m putting this in the appendix. In its own right distinguished by terrible acting and mostly unfunny humor. “While some scientists have worried this might plunge the universe into absolute chaos, we solved the problem by firing them!”

A PERFECT DAY (2006) is a Richard Paul Evans adaptation wherein Rob Lowe transforms from family man to careerist jerk after he writes a best-selling book, but starts realizing what really matters after an ominous stranger (Christopher Lloyd) warns him time is running out. Not for the book, as Lloyd isn’t Lowe’s future self as I’d suspected, and very, very trite. Though to the creators’ credit, I didn’t suspect the big twist near the end. “Heads of horses were as heads of lions!”

A DARK MATTER (2013) has lots of talk about seeing into multiple dimensions, but it’s actually a mundane, would-be noirish story of an artist caught in a love triangle with his girlfriend, her ex-girlfriend, and a psycho collecting transplanted eyes. The talk doesn’t add any depth (or qualify even for the appendix) and the core story is flat (Yesterday Was a Lie was actually a little more entertaining in its pretensions). “I am talking about the most important discovery since man walked on the moon!”

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Filed under Movies, Now and Then We Time Travel

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