I’m close to finishing up my long (re)watch of Howard Hawks, though it’ll be a couple more months at least.
Donald C. Willis of Films of Howard Hawks unaccountably loathes GENTLEMEN PREFER BLONDES (1953) — well not unaccountable, he loathes Marilyn Monroe for what he considers her “aggressive, brainless, painless sexuality” (he expressed similar disdain over her in Monkey Business). I think she and Jane Russell are both terrific.
The film adapts a Broadway musical based on Anita Loos’ same-name book, with Monroe as the book’s central character, Lorelei Lee (I’ve read the character is sharper in the novel). Lorelei’s a mercenary beauty out to marry amiable, slightly dim and very wealthy Gus (Tommy Noonan); she’s deeply troubled that her BFF Dorothy (Russell) is perfectly happy with guys who are good-looking and fun, regardless of wealth. Doesn’t Dorothy realize it’s just as easy to fall for a rich man as a poor one? It’s Lorelei’s duty to protect her friend from her own worst instincts.
The plot concerns the duo going to France as showgirls — Gus’s father doesn’t want Lorelei marrying him and she hopes blowing Gus off for a while will stiffen his spine. Complications include a gumshoe (Elliott Reed) sent to catch Lorelei cheating but finding Dorothy so gosh-darn sexy, and conniving lecher “Piggy” (Charles Coburn). The end results rely almost entirely on the charm of the two female leads but that more than enough, especially when Monroe cuts loose in “Diamonds Are A Girl’s Best Friend” (the song Madonna pays homage to in “Material Girl”), showing why Hollywood could never clone her successfully. However Dorothy buying time for her friend by impersonating her at the climax isn’t quite charming enough. Not a classic, but enjoyable “I think you’re the only girl in the world who can stand on stage with a spotlight in her eyes and see a diamond inside a man’s pocket.”
I’ve read one of the reasons Hawks was dismissed for years as a talented lightweight was that he never confined himself to one genre the way Alfred Hitchcock was “the Master of Suspense” or John Ford was associated with Westerns. As witness he followed the above picture with LAND OF THE PHARAOHS (1955), a historical epic that, as Willis puts it, halfway works “until it runs headlong into Joan Collins.”
The pharaoh Khufu (Jack Hawkins) is rapacious in his lust for gold and jewels even by Egyptian imperial standards. Looking ahead, he’s worried he won’t be able to take it with him — haven’t countless cleverly designed burial chambers been looted by tomb robbers? The solution: offer the brilliant architect Vashtar (James Robertson Justice) the chance to liberate his captive people in return for designing the unrobbable pyramid. Vashtar himself will have to die, knowing the secret, but his people will be free, so he agrees.
This is good looking in the way many epics were, but not terribly interesting otherwise (and it’s entirely performed by white actors in brownface). It falls apart completely when Collins as the scheming queen Nellifer enters the picture. Khufu’s second wife, she wants power and she really wants those pretty things that are going to be wasted being stuck in a pyramid. Hawkins isn’t right for the role but still, he is the lord of Egypt and that gives his actions a certain grandeur. Nellifer’s an uninspired and not particularly memorable palace intriguer. Collins could have played the role well maybe 10 or 15 years later but at this point she’s in her early 20s and not yet good enough. “In the presence of Pharaoh, you kneel.”
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