JESUS OF MONTREAL (1989) is a Canadian film in which a priest hires a local actor/writer to freshen up the church’s old passion play only to freak out that the revamped version tries for Historical Plausibility (“You’re telling people Jesus was the bastard child of a Roman soldier!”), leading to the inevitable martyrdom of the lead. One that probably shouldn’t work but it does. “The Bible can be made to say anything — I know from experience.”
KING LEAR (1916) is a one hour silent version in which the cast appears to be dressed in vaguely Biblical guise. A good job condensing the plot down but silent-style acting and cue cards for the dialog doens’t do it for me. “O let me not be mad, not be mad sweet heaven.”
DJANGO (196 ) is a spaghetti Western in which Union veteran Francisco Nero wanders into a clash between Mexican revolutionaries and die-hard Confederates and Mexican revolutionaries. Django then proceeds to shoot up everyone who pisses him off or threatens the sex worker he’s fallen for. I’m not normally a Western fan but this one worked for me. “Start praying if you like. I don’t mind — it’s the smart thing to do when you know death is coming for you.”
An injured race-car driver cries STOP ME BEFORE I KILL (1960) when the aftermath of an accident has him thinking violent thoughts about his wife (Diane Cilento) — is there any chance a kindly psychiatrist can turn things around? Unfortunately I guessed the big twist well in advance and the movie doesn’t offer enough compensation to make up for it. “What I want to know is — who asked for twin beds?”
CASH ON DEMAND (1961) is a filmed stage play that shows Christmas crime stories go back well before Die Hard. Peter Cushing is an icy bank manager, distant from his staff and, it’s implied, from his family. Nevertheless, when it turns out bank inspector Andre Morrell is really a bank robber holding them hostage, Cushing finds himself gripped with terror. He’ll cooperate to get his wife and son out alive, but can Morrell’s seemingly perfect plan go off without a hitch? Effective, with solid performances by the two leads and the supporting cast. “I detest brutality — I want bank robberies to be smoother, more sociable.”
THEATER CAMP (2023) is a mockumentary wherein the nitwit son of stroke-smitten camp founder Amy Sedaris struggles to hold down the fort while the kids and teachers continue the usual work of Putting On Several Shows (“Then they’ll turn you away — because you’re non-union.”) — but will the mountain of debt on the mortgage bring everything crashing down? Summer camps like this are outside my theater experience but it’s a winner in its own right. “You were the first lesbian nurse couple that ever lived.”
Damn, THE HISTORY OF TIME TRAVEL (2014) is the second time I’ve discovered a film I missed when writing Now and Then We Time Travel (the other being the Christian film Mr. Scrooge to See You). This mockumentary discusses how one brilliant scientist destroyed his marriage with his obsessive struggles to perfect time travel; when his son finally succeeds, the boy’s first thought is to fix the damage to his family (I’ll Follow You Down would be a good double-bill). However neither he nor anyone else remembers the original history has changed, nor do they remember the next change, nor the next … Very nicely done, including little touches like the Talking Heads changing appearance as the timelines shift. “Driven by remorse and regret, Edward spent the next twenty years of his life trying to travel through time.”
#SFWApro. All rights to images remain with current holders.
